Mom defends 8-year-old daughter's right to read during family vacation, family members ask her to "reconsider": 'My MIL and FIL have spent the entire breakfast scowling at me'

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Nov 20, 2024 5:00 PM EST

Many parents have to beg their children to pick up a book, but some have the exact opposite issue: They can't get their kids to stop reading! 

When you get really into reading as a child, you want to read all the time. Whether you're reading under the table at dinner time, or sneaking a flashlight into your room to read under the covers, you'll find any scrap of time to read. It's addicting to be engrossed in a fascinating mystery or a horror book. It's also a lot better than playing endless video games or spending an entire day on an iPad. The kids are enriching their own knowledge and growing their vocabulary. 

In contrast, some parents cannot get their kids to read at all. Their kids will just throw the books down in frustration, or give up before they get a chapter in. It's like pulling teeth! So having a kid who loves to bury their head in a book is usually seen as a good thing. But one grandma is butting heads with her daughter-in-law over her daughter's reading habits. Grandma thinks she's reading too much during a beach vacation! Luckily for this little girl, her family had her back. 

Up next, read about the neighbors who kept disagreeing over their shared fence, with one frustrated dude saying, "[My] neighbor was petty... I'm going to make him replace his whole fence."

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    Cheezburger Image 10430964480
    via Cole Keister For Unsplash+

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    AITAH For Ignoring the Wishes of My MIL and Letting My Daughter Read on Family Vacation?
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    39F here. Wife and momma of three (10M, 8F, and 5F). My husband Joe is one of three boys. His parents have a vacation home in Hawaii and every year they invite the kids, in-laws, and grandkids for a week long family vacation. Some context is that Joe and his brothers were all competitive athletes and loved playing sports and games on family vacations. My in-laws.
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    encourage this with the grandkids (there are currently 7) and are always trying to get them to play sand soccer or football on the beach. My son and younger daughter love the games and also being in the water, but my middle daughter Julia is different.
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    Julia is smart and creative, but she's also a sensitive and introverted little girl. She has friends at school, but isn't as eager to play with her male cousins because they don't have as much in common with her. Julia and her friends at school love playing pretend (they've created an entire imaginary
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    world) and putting on shows (we now have her in theatre and ballet). My four nephews and other two kids aren't interested in these activities and enjoy running around and playing sports all day like Joe and his brothers did when they were kids. Julia, for whatever reason, just seems to have a different personality than the other kids in the family.
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    My daughter is also a huge bookworm and is completely hooked on the Goosebumps series. When I say hooked, I mean that she spends almost all of her free time reading these books and begs me to take her to the bookstore to buy more frequently. She loves telling me
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    about the books she's reading and has even started writing her own Goosebumps stories before bed. I personally am happy that my daughter loves to read and is so creative, and I try to encourage her to pursue these interests. She's definitely a bit "quirky" compared to my other two, but she's being herself and pursuing her own interests which I love.
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    We got to the island on Thursday night and spent all day Friday and Saturday at the beach and are going to the pool today. Julia plays with her cousins at the house and talks to them at meals, but during the day, she just wants to sit next to me and read her books. I have encouraged her to swim for a little bit since we're in
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    Hawaii, and she goes in the water for a few minutes, but then she asks if she can get back to her book. She's played a few games with her cousins and siblings when I coax her, but again, she honestly just wants to be reading Goosebumps. Overall, when we're at the beach, I'd say she spends 1/5 of the time playing and 4/5ths of the time reading.
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    She would probably spend the whole time reading if I didn't encourage her to try other things for a little bit. My husband doesn't see an issue with Julia spending the days reading. He says we're on vacation and it's about her having fun. He says if she wants to read on the beach all day, it's her
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    decision, and she's at least getting some sun, having a blast, and enriching her mind. I generally agree, although I do wish she'd swim a bit more since were in Hawaii and also spend more time with the other kids.
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    This morning before breakfast, my MIL pulled my husband and I to the side and asked if we were going to let Julia bring her book to the pool today. My husband said yes and my MIL asked us to reconsider. She said the trip is about family and Julia creating memories with her siblings and cousins. I told my MIL that Julia is
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    very introverted and that she bonds with the other kids at the house, during meals, and for a bit at the beach, but she doesn't need to be running around with them 24/7 to create happy memories. My MIL then accused us of spoiling Julia, encouraging her to be anti-social, and teaching her that her individual desires are
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    more important than being part of the group. My MIL also says her obsession with Goosebumps is unhealthy, and that Julia isn't interested in talking about anything that isn't related to fictional stories and characters. She does talk about Goosebumps a lot, but my MIL is exaggerating a bit.
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    This set off my husband, and he said that Julia has friends at school but has different interests than her cousins and siblings. He said he wants her to enjoy her vacation and if that means her reading all day, then he supports it as long as it's not impacting the rest of the group. The convo
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    ended with me telling my MIL that Julia can bring her books to the pool and that I'm not going to force her to spend her trip doing things she's not interested in. My MIL and FIL have spent the entire breakfast scowling at me and my husband. At one point Julia started telling my MIL about
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    her favorite Goosebumps book and my MIL said she isn't interested in hearing anything else about Goosebumps. She also said that Julia should talk about things that interest other people as well, and Julia started asking her Grandma about the books she liked and tennis. My husband told his mom not to parent his child in front of everyone, and it was very awkward.
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    We're about to head to the pool and I'm letting Julia bring her books, but I'm not sure if I'm doing the right thing? I'm trying to find the balance between letting her enjoy the trip and also being part of the group? Any advice would be appreciated.
    via u/Green-Bee1043
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    GreatGollyGer... Forcing a child to be social when they aren't ready will not allow for the confidence it requires to become truly social. Villainizing a child for liking. books is isolating and cruel, and straight up stupid. MIL needs to buzz off. NtA
    via u/GreatGollyGertie
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    No_Good_Turn NTA. You and your husband can raise your child however you like. It's nice of the MIL/FIL to host you on vaca, but that doesn't give them the right to lord as tyrants and second guess your parenting decisions. Thank your MIL for her kindness but stand firm on your parenting decisions. Enjoy your time in paradise. NTA.
    via u/No_Good_Turn
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    Turmeric_Ping Let her be herself. She's introverted, being 'part of the group' is a bit much for her, so she reads her book. Good to see your husband isn't a mommy's boy and is standing up for his child.
    via u/Turmeric_Ping
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    mwlnga NTA maintain your parenting boundaries. Your kids are very fortunate to have both of you as their parents.
    via u/mwlnga
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    Artistic_Refer... Tell Julia she's a rockstar for how she accommodated grandma's request for a topic change instead of making it awkward.
    via u/Artistic_Reference_5

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family drama aita reading kids mother siblings grandma beach family feud goosebumps in laws Grandpa family grandparents daughter Father
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